Books All Young Children Should Own

I'll give some recommendations for specific titles, but these are all types of books for which many titles would work. You can "kill two birds with one stone" so to speak with many of titles.  Also, most popular authors like Lucy Cousins, Rosemary Wells, or Sandra Boynton have an alphabet and counting book, even if they aren't listed here. 

• Cloth or vinyl book - You can't get these at most libraries, which is probably a good thing.  Books like these are meant for chewing.  They provide a very early reading experience without you worrying about the book being destroyed or your little one getting hunks of cardboard in his mouth. 

• Recommendations: Sesame Street makes several titles that are vinyl which I purchased at the dollar store; Let's Play Elmo Says which includes an Elmo puppet; Tiger Tales makes several cloth books including Jumping Jungle and Busy Bugs; Maisy's Snuggle Book by Lucy Cousins; Baby's Day by Karen Katz; Busy Bee and Squishy Turtle both by Roger Priddy

• Body parts - Learning the names of our body parts is basic and important content.  Once your child knows his parts, a huge leap in communication can happen.  You can now direct his body.  He can also tell you what hurts. 

• Recommendations: Here Are My Hands by Bill Martin Jr; Where is Baby's Belly Button? by Karen Katz (also a lift the flap book); Toes, Ears, & Nose! by Marion Dane Baure (also a lift the flap book); From Head to Toe by Eric Carle

• Bed time - Bed time is a wonderful time to fit reading into your day.  A quiet book about going to bed, complete with mushy I-love-yous, hugs, and kisses, is a  great way to get your child to slow down and snuggle into bed.  Bed time reading is a great way to make reading pleasurable and bed time calming. 

• Recommendations: Goodnight Moon by Margret Wise Brown; Maisy Goes to Bed by Lucy Cousins; Goodnight Spot by Eric Hill; Pajama Time by Sandra Boynton; Dinosaur Vs Bedtime by Bob Shea; Tuck Me In by Dean Hacohen (also a lift the flap book);

• Animals - Most kids' books focus on farm animals, but it doesn't have to be.  Learning about animals is a great venue for animal noises, colors, textures, habitats, and sizes. 

• Recommendations: Big Red Barn by Margret Wise Brown; Open the Barn Door (also a lift the flap book) by Chris Santoro; First 100 Animals by Roger Priddy; Brown Bear, Brown Bear What Do You See? by Bill Martin Jr; Barnyard Dance by Sandra Boynton

• Vehicles - Machines are just interesting and cool, so a book of the many types of vehicles that populate our world can spark interest in how machines work as well as the professions for which they are used. 

• Recommendations: books by Byron Barton like Trucks; Planes; Boats; First 100 Trucks by Roger Priddy; Vroom Vroom Maisy by Lucy Cousins; Go, Maisy, Go! by Lucy Cousins (also a lift the flap book); Fisher Price Little People Cars, Trucks, Planes, and Trains (also a lift the flap book)

• Touch and feel - A touch and feel book provides awesome opportunists to label textures and discuss items that have those textures. These are pretty easy to find at stores like Walmart and Kmart.  Look for variety in the textures.  A book which repeats the same texture over and over is not as much fun and doesn't provide as much to learn. 

• Recommendations: Pat the Bunny by Dorothy Kunhardt; Have You Ever Tickled a Tiger? by Betsy E Snyder; Goodnight Max by Rosemary Wells: DK publishers makes many different touch and feel titles featuring different animals

• Lift the flap - What wonderful books these are.  There is fine motor control.  There is the fun of peekaboo.  Lots of these books are question and answer. Many of these books fit into the other categories listed here. 

• Recommendations: Where's Spot? by Eric Hill; Where's Baby's ... series by Karen Katz; Open the Barn Door by Chris Santoro; Go, Maisy, Go! by Lucy Cousins; Tuck Me In by Dean Hacohen; Fisher Price Little People lift the flap books such as Let's Go to the Farm; Peek-a-Moo by Marie Torres Cimarusti; Dear Zoo by Rod Campbell; also common for popular TV shows to have lift the flap books

• Alphabet - The benefits of this one are pretty obvious.  The key here is to fine a good alphabet book.  The best ones stand alone as an interesting book with the alphabet as secondary.  You can find alphabet books on almost any subject.  

• Recommendations: Eating the Alphabet by Lois Ehlert; ABC's of Cookies by PJ Shaw (Sesame Street book); Gone Wild by David McLimans; Chicka Chicka Boom Boom by Bill Martin Jr; Max's ABC's by Rosemary Wells;  A to Z by Sandra Boynton

• Numbers - Just as the alphabet is the foundation of learning to read, numbers are the building blocks to math. 

• Recommendations: Ten, Nine, Eight by Molly Bang; Duck & Goose 1,2, 3 by Tad Hills; Ten in Bed by David Ellwand; 10 Rubber Ducks by Eric Carle; Maisy Counts by Lucy Cousins; Hippos Go Berserk and One, Two, Three! by Sandra Boynton

• First words - This type of book is great for early language acquisition.  Lots of fun for your child to point and you to label, and then when she is a little older, for you to ask questions and your child to answer, either pointing or talking.  

• Recommendations: Roger Priddy has many different first words books.  We like First 100 Words the best.  There are many other choices out there by different authors including on by DK publishers and Little Einstiens.

• Emotions - Books are a great way for children to start to develop empathy by understanding the emotions shown in the pictures.  These types of stories also help children understand their own emotions and then communicate them. 

• Recommendations: Duck & Goose: How Are You Feeling? by Tad Hills; Baby Happy, Baby Sad by Leslie Patricelli;  

• Food - Reading about food is just fun, but it also opens up discussion of taste, colors, shapes, and sizes. 

• Recommendations: The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle; Eating the Alphabet by Lois Ehlert; Grandpa and Me by Karen Katz (also a lift the flap book); Spot Bakes a Cake by Eric Hill (also a lift the flap book); Today is Monday by Eric Carle; I Like Vegetables by Lorena Siminovich (also touch and feel); Pete's a Pizza by William Steig

• Nursery Rhymes - These are the little rhymes everyone knows.  Children love to sing and repeat them.  Many have motions or dances to help get kids active.  From birth, children like the sound of nursery rhymes.  They are a fabulous way to share language with your child. 

• Recommendations: My Very First Mother Goose by Rosemary Wells; single rhyme board books by Annie Kubler such as Row, Row, Row Your Boat; Itsy Bitsy Spider; and I'm a Little Tea Pot

I'm feeling like the worst mother right now.  Four times in just over 12 hours, I've tried to let William cry-it-out.  Last night he woke up at 9:20, which is unusally early even with his recent increase in wakings.  Mike couldn't calm him, so I nursed him back to sleep even though he had eatten well two hours before.  He wakes again at 1020.  I tried to rock him to sleep.  He falls asleep in my arms, but wakes the second he is placed down.  We do this twice.  I then decide to let him cry.  Half an hour later, he is still screeching.  And I give up.  Mike rocks him back to sleep and William wakes up ten minutes later.  William stayed with me for the rest of the night next to me in the bed. 

I'm so frustrated because I do NOT want to start co-sleeping.  Not only is it uncomfortable and I worry about him falling off the bed because he's such a squirmer, but I do NOT want to deal with breaking the habit later.  And, I'm getting tired of holding him while he sleeps.  Now, nursing him to sleep I don't mind.  But after a half an hour or so, it starts to get old.  I have to pee or my butt hurts.  I can't get comfortable to sleep or I need to sneeze or cough.  Or its during the day and I have other things I need or want to do.  And, sometimes I have to go get Natalie up from a nap or she has to wait for me to change a poopy diaper.  This just isn't working well for us anymore. 

This morning I tried to put him down for a nap about two hours after he work up and he just howled.  Thought maybe he wasn't tired yet and his sleep pattern is shifting.  Tried again over an hour later once he'd been up for three hours and again he just screamed and wiggled around his whole crib.  Then I nurse him and he goes to sleep for 30 minutes waking up when I talk to Natalie, who is being very patient about having a poopy diaper.  We miss going to story time even though Natalie says she wants to see her friends. 

After Natalie goes down for nap, I take William into his room.  I read to him as I nurse him.  He eats well.  He falls asleep.  I drift off some too.  Half an hour later, I don't really want to be sitting in there anymore, so I try to move him.  He wakes immediately and then screams for 20 plus minutes before finally quieting and sleeping. 

I just don't know what his deal is.  Two months ago he was waking only twice a night.  A week ago he was going down for naps in his crib often without a peep, but if not, then only a few minutes of mild crying. 

Maybe he is old enough to miss me know since he is six months old, but that is all the more reason we can't go on this way.  With Natalie, I used to hold her for two hour plus long naps daily until she was 7 or 8 months old.  But with Natalie I also had nothing else to do all day.  And, Natalie also slept through the night, so I didn't mind getting some snuggle during the day since I had free time and a full night of sleep every night. 

I just dread going to bed in his room waiting for him to wake up. 

And today I've felt like all I've done is stop children from crying. 

William had been doing better playing again, but is just so hard to please.  Natalie was such an easy baby to play with.  She was happy with a few toys to chew on.  But William usually has no interest in his toys.  He tries to move around on the floor.  He wants to chew on your clothes, constantly.  Whenever we nurse, he is  pulling my collar into his mouth or pulling my sweatshirt around to his mouth.  Its maddening.  Play with him on the floor and he's chewing on your knee or trying to get your ankel in his mouth.  He pulls up the blankets on the floor to chew.  Finds Natalie's pjs and socks.  Its ridiculous.  But the 50 or so toys, he could care less about most of the time.   And he wants you to hold him up to stand, but then bends over.  Our play group facilitator says he is one of the strongest babies she's ever held.  I want him to be happy, but I just can't sit there all day holding him up to stand, especially when he just squirms.  He won't sit on my lap and play, but he seems to miss me.  I feel like I never give him good attention because I get so frustrated with trying to play with him.  He pulls books away to chew when I read to him.  Isn't interested in toys I offer.  Flops over to roll when I sit across from him. 

Add to this, Natalie's legs are bothering her.  We first noticed it when she had the torticollis, but thought it was a reaction to keeping the rest of her body stiff to guard her neck.  But now that we are confident that her neck is fine (she never mentions it anymore and is so much happier in general).  So, we thought the trouble getting out of bed was drama to get attention, maybe a little stiffness or growing pains.  But then we looked at her 2 1/2 year milestones and starting thinking about how she moves.  She still doesn't jump.  She seems to have regressed on stair climbing.  She cries when we ask her to pull down her own pants or take off her shoes.  Sometimes she walks in this tiny little stiff steps.  But other times she is racing around with no problems.  Mike look it up and it sounds spot on like juvenile arthritis.  We have an appointment on Friday to look into it.  But I feel horrible about it.  We are trying to push her to get up out of bed, to dress her self, to go up a couple stairs on her own, and she just resists and cries as she's doing it.  Are we pushing too hard?  Are we expecting too much of her "being a big girl"?  Or is she really in serious pain?  I want to keep moving ahead with her being independent, but also want to snuggle her because she could be in pain.  But, I don't want to go back to four months ago where she was stationed on my lap constantly and William was virtually ignored. 

About twenty minutes of silence from William and now he is screeching again.  I've peeked in a few times over the last hour and his eyes are closed.  I think a huge part of the problem is that Natalie sucks her thumb and William does not.  A few months ago, he was sucking his thumb, but I've noticed recently that he is not doing it now.  I have no idea why he stopped.  Teething pain?  But he'll still nurse to sleep.  Anyway, not sure how long I should let this crying go on since he's only napped a total of an hour all day today so far.  He usually has a nice long nap at least once a day.  I feel like I'm torturing and abandoning him, but going in and getting him will only 1) wake him up to come play thus keeping him from the sleep he needs or 2) give in to his crying like I did last night reinforcing him to keep doing it to get me to hold him while he sleeps.  Again, he must be so confused that sometimes crying works for me to nurse him and sometimes it doesn't.  

I was worried that this night waking was a nursing problem.  He has been struggling with day time nursing because he is so insainely curious that he doesn't nurse much during the day.  Sometimes just being in the same room with Natalie is enough to make him stop and arch to see what is going on.  Ditto with the TV.  But Natalie still isn't comfortable with me leaving to go nurse him in his room in the dark multiple times a day.  I do it sometimes, but she doesn't like it unless the TV is on, and watching too much TV without playing is already enough of a problem.  So, I thought this waking at night was to get more to eat to make up for the day time.  I was handling that, though I didn't like it, but waking up after only an hour?  Refusing to be put back in the crib?  That's something different.  Natalie and I were just sick with colds, so I've considered him getting sick, especially with him coughing, but there are no other symptoms.  No phlegm.  And the cough is only when in bed.  Its like that attention seeking cough I've read about.  And of course I worry about food allergies.  We are trying baby led weaning.  Its been very hard for me to just go with the flow and let him try what we are eatting when we are eatting it instead of the one food a day for 5 - 7 days we did with Natalie.  That just doesn't work with BLW since we don't have the same food available for that long.  (For example, we don't eat carrots for a whole week or Natalie doesn't eat crackers for a week at lunch).  the idea is for the food to be the same as us.  But of course he is going through this craziness right after tasting a chunk of pancake on Sunday and cracker today at lunch.  No other symptoms of allergy, and he didn't actually eat anymore than a crumb probably, but I can't help myself from worrying about it.  This whole BLW approach makes sense and I want to continue with it, but I'm just frustrated.  All it is is finger foods at 6 months versus 9 months.  But without a pincher grasp, we have to give him big pieces to suck and gnaw and we worry about choking.  Today he gagged and spit up on a piece of banana, but he didn't seem to care any.  I just feel crazy for doing it and don't even want to think about solid food for him anymore.  I just want to skip it and come back to it in three months.  I just remember Natalie eating everything with her hands at 9 months and it was so easy. 

He was quiet again for ten minutes and now he's crying out again.  I'm dreading bed time tonight.  Its usually great with very little crying, and that is only when we force him to hold still for diaper and pjs.  But I just foresee him being overtired and refusing to be laid down in the crib.  I envision him howling all through Natalie's bed time.  And, I'm supposed to go to book club on Friday.  I feel horrible thinking about leaving Mike home with him as William wails like this.  Maybe it will be over by Friday; its still three nights and two days away.  I just feel like I'm damaging poor William.  First he gets so much less attention than Natalie did at this age, and now this.  Millions of people use this technique, but I still feel horrible leaving him alone when he is so obviously emotionally upset.  I can hear a clear difference in his cries.  Its one thing to block out his tired cry or his fussy cry.  But this is a powerful, loud, angry cry.  But part of me still wonders if it will ultimately work.  If we stuck to it, would he actually let me put in down in bed without crying, or is this just a phase that would pass in a day or so anyway?  If we did this, would be sleep through the night?  I just feel like the answer is no.  We are going through this for no reason.  Or, just for my convenience in not wanting to hold him as he naps or have him sleep with me in bed all night.  Is this part of the inconvenience you take on as a parent?  Part of me feels, that yes, it is, and I'm being selfish and making him suffer for no good reason.  But another part of me says, no, I'm not expected to just hold him for hours when he is no longer a newborn.  And to top it off, we'll never know if we just caved if he would have gotten over this on his own in a day or two because maybe it is just a cold or a new tooth or a growth spurt or a new mental leap (Wonder Week). 

That last bit of crying was very short.  I must say that I've been day dreaming of having both kids sleeping in their beds in the afternoon for a while now, but I didn't want it to happen like this and I didn't want to have to use my free time as blog-therapy. 

Sometimes I wonder at women's claims to be unable to breastfeed. Are these women really just uninformed and unsupported? Do they give in to formula when they need to feed 15 times a day and their nipples are cracked and bleeding? Or is there truly a precentage of women who can't breastfeed and that was a contributing factor to high infant death rates before formula was easily accessable? I do seem to have breastfed longer than anyone I know well. My mother friends either couldn't start, or stopped by 6 months. When I add those I know less well, I can think of two moms.

Right now I'm struggling with co-sleeping. William stays asleep when he is with me. Right now, he's been asleep in my lap on the nursing pilloe for about an hour. Before that, he slept soundly laying in bed next to me for two hours. I want him to sleep. I want to sleep. But I don't want to get to a point where he depends on me being there to sleep at all, and I don't want to break the habit later. Maybe its already too late.

William had been especially crabby for about a week. He learned to sit, then started to refuse to sit. Finally yesterday he seemed happy again. He was roaming around on the living room floor using a combination of rolling and pushing. Hopefully this was all he needed. He is very different than Natalie. She was content to sit in one place and play for a long time. William wants nothing to do with his toys much of the time. Instead, he wants to explore real world things. He wants to be carried around so he can see everything and he is far more interested in my mug or the remote than any toy. Natalie also had a lot more of my direct attention, but even when I play with William alone, that doesn't seem to change things. His crabbiness and frustration don't seem to be lonliness related. He does get very upset when tired though. Thankfully, he is doing well with going down for naps in his crib, but there length varies greatly from 20 minutes to two hours. I sometimes wonder if the night issues are making up for the day. He sleeps with me to get his mommy time, as well as nursing because he often is too distracted by everything to nurse long during the day.

Natalie seems to be coming out the otherside of her neck and night problems. For the last week about, she seems to be calling out in her sleep less. She is waking up happier leading to more good days. She is whining for attention. We are working on telling her that she needs to talk like a big girl and that we can't understand that voice. It must be hard for her since William gets to act like a baby and get lots of attention, yet she can't. She can be very frustrating when a small set back, like stumbling, sets her off in a long bad mood with constant begging to sit and snuggle in our laps. I feel horrible having to tell her no to a hug, but in reality, I can't hug her in the middle of changing a poopy diaper or when I am putting William in the car seat so we won't be late. We are also trying to model and reinforce to ask for help instead of having a break down. Natalie has always been easily frustrated and quick to give up asking us to did things for her. I worry about this for when she starts school. But another good thing around here is Natalie showing independence. She is helping a lot. She sets the table every night. She sometimes helps put the plastic stuff on the counter from the dishwasher or put the laundry in the washer or helps feed the cats. She also is good at suggesting ways to cheer William up. She's learned to blow her nose if we hold the tissue, how to hit mute on the remote, and is learning how to screw caps on and off. I wish we could make some head way on dressing and undressing though. She can pull her shirt over her head and put on her boots, but that's about it. I have a feeling William is going to be the kind of kid who takes all his clothes off and plays with his poop in his diaper.

I think another sign that Natalie is happier is that she has been saying I love you unprompted a lot recently. Another I love hearing her say is thank you, especailly when she gets something she is excited about. I can't believe how polite she is sometimes.

Natalie is almost 2.5 now. I've been thinking about preschool and Kindergarten. I couldn't find any info on our town or school web sites so I sent an email. I did find a Kindergarten checklist and Natalie can already do a few things on it. Most notably Natalie talks in long sentences pretty much all the time and knows her shapes and colors. We've been working with her on letters the last few days when we read her this one alphabet book she likes. She knows a few letters, which I find impressive. I also think I've finally taught her N is for Natalie. Speaking of names, I need to start teaching her her full name and address, but I'm a little stuck on how since she doesn't understand the concepts.

Dress Up Box (girl)

Now that Natalie is about two and a half, dressing up has become almost a daily activity.  Here are some ideas for a dress up box.  Some are very girly, but many work for both boys and girls.

• Custom jewelry - I saved a whole bunch of mine from when I was a kid / young teen.  These were the first dress up items with which Natalie enjoyed playing.  She started with bangle bracelets, then moved to long beaded necklaces like Marti Grais beads, and now she wears the beaded jewelry on elastic string.
• Halloween customs - I've put both of Natalie's past Halloween customs in the box, but she usually just plays with the small pieces like the witch's hat and lady bug antenna on a head band.
• Dollar store items - Its even better if you can go at Halloween, but all year round you can find some custom items at the dollar store such as crowns, wands, cowboy hats, and necklaces. I got Natalie fairy wings and a fire fighter helmet there at Halloween. 
• Mom's shoes - Be sensible about the height of the heel to prevent injury.  I have clear memories of playing with my mom's heels. 
• Purses - I also have clear memories of playing with my mom's old purse.  I have passed on to Natalie my purses that matched my prom and bridesmaid dresses. 
• Hats - Any and all are great be them merely pretty or representative of a profession.
• Sunglasses
• Doctor's kit - You can buy many different types of doctor's kits but the must have item is the "doctorscope" as Natalie calls it.  Try getting a white, button-up tee for a lab coat. 
• Cape - Natalie is happy with a receiving blanket knotted once at the neck, but you can buy them, too.  (A smaller piece of cloth can give your child's lovey a matching cape, too!)
• Disney Princess dresses - Expensive, but fun.  
• Masks - You have to be careful here because masks can be scary.  Natalie likes a Batman mask I cut off the back of a cereal box.  
• Outdoor clothes - Natalie has fun with boots, raincoats, hats, and mittens.  They are more fun in the off season.  

First picture of Natalie playing dress up

Had to get one of William in there :)

More on how to Not Go Crazy as a Stay at Home Mom

When I had just one child who slept ten to twelve hours straight a night, just getting out of the house pretty much every day was enough to keep me sane.  But now with the addition of William to our family and Natalie working on accepting his arrival and her place in the world as a two-year-old, it takes a bit more than a walk around the block or a trip to the library to keep me going.

You're being such a baby!:
While this is an insult for adults, it is very grounding for my husband and I to say to ourselves sometimes.  When one of the kids is driving us crazy we just remember they are a baby and a toddler!  That is how they are supposed to act!

Turn your frustration into something silly:
When your baby is squirming instead of letting you change him, go with it and wrestle.  Find yourself growling as you struggle with the car seat straps, pretend to be bear.  Feel like throwing things?  Do it in a silly way.  Throw all the diapers up in the air so they can rain back down on you.  Dump all the toys on the floor and make a big mess.  You'll feel better to let it out. 

Trust Daddy:
It doesn't have to be the kids' father, it could be grandma, or a friend, but let someone else watch the kids and stay out of it as much as possible!  I have a hard time with this sometimes.  If I can hear what is happening, I can't help but want to butt in.  To help with this, I recommend blocking out the noise by taking a shower or using headphones.  These help me not hear what is going on so that I can truly get a break.  Headphones are especially great in the morning when you want to go back to sleep for a bit.   With my daughter, I didn't sleep in until she weaned off her morning nursing at almost a year old!  Looking back, there was no need for that.  With my son, I feed him, and then ask my husband to get up with him for a while.  The only job my husband can't do is breastfeed the baby.  Everything else he can do just as well as I do all week long by myself. 

Get out of the house by yourself:
About 6 weeks before William was born, I had my first Mom's Day Off.  For the first time since Natalie's birth, I left the house for pretty much Mike's normal work hours.  I visited a friend, went shopping, got a hair cut, and spent some time just sitting in a Starbucks on the computer.  Now that William is here and nursing exclusively, I can't leave for a full day, but I can leave for 2-4 hours at a time.  Sometimes I leave just to do a quick errand that is easier to do without kids along.  But, twice now I've just left and spent time sitting in a Starbucks writing blogs, playing on line, and listening to music.  We try to plan these times for me to get out alone after particularly difficult weeks, but there is really no reason why you couldn't have a little outing to yourself every weekend.  Remember, if you can handle it from 8-5, five days a week, Dad can handle it for an hour while you go for a run, get your nails done, or get a cup of coffee.  Another way to get out of the house is to join some kind of adult group.  I am now part of a book club, so about once a month, I have a guaranteed reason to go out by myself for a few hours.  Another option is to take some kind of adult education class.  But, don't forget about your spouse!  Dad also needs time away that isn't while he is at work, and you need to find some time as a couple, too. 

Join a play group or make one of your own:
If you have lived in the same area for a long time, you might not need this as much as I did.  I moved to Maine after graduating from college, and I only knew my husband and colleagues from work.  Once I started to stay home, I knew no one who was home all day long excepting my mother two hours away in Massachusetts.  Joining a play group at our community center and going to our public library story times allowed me to meet other moms, some of which were stay at home moms, too.  Play group was a great venue to see how other kids grow and behave, but the best part was an outlet for me to talk to other moms.  Now that I've gotten to know a few moms and their kids well, we've started our own meeting once a week rotating between our houses.  The play date keeps the kids busy and happy (for the most part, two-year-olds do have a bit of a trouble sharing), and we moms get to talk, which leads to ...

Somehow share your thoughts and frustrations:
 There are many ways to do this.  Of course, there is your husband.  Sometimes Mike doesn't fully understand what I'm trying to say, but much of the time he does, especially just after he's spent a lot of time with the kids.  What a relief it is to hear him mirror the same frustrations I've been dealing with during the week.  It validates me and generally makes me feel less crazy.  No matter how understanding your husband is, I recommend having at least one other way of venting your mothering feelings.  Sometimes there will be things he just can't get because he isn't the one getting his nipple bitten or falling into snow banks getting the car seat back into the car.  You might confined in other moms or friends.  Your mom, sister, or mother-in-law might be a great person to talk to about motherhood.  For me, I often write about these things, as I have most of my thoughts since adolescence, hence having a blog.  And, try to share all the good things as well as the bad.  Take a moment to write about a great day you had with your children or to share a big family accomplishment another mom at play group. 

Find a way to give back:
Maybe this is just the teacher in me, but sharing what I've learned these past few years really does help me cope with being a mom.  I enjoy writing this blog because I can reflect on what I've learned and put it out there for others to learn from if they are in need.  I also enjoy helping other moms I meet because so many of them have given me advice.  Another way us moms can support each other is swapping clothes and toys.  It is a huge relief when a friend just hands you a perfect winter coat for your child or two laundry baskets full of clothes for your newborn.  I try to return the favor as much as possible by giving our extra clothes, toys, and linens to those in need, be them friends or anonymous members of the community.  And even though its more work, I find it recharging to open my home to other moms and kids. 

Get a baby sitter!:
It was about 15 months before we had a real baby sitter for Natalie.  It wasn't that I was overly protective of her, but that we didn't have any connections to find a baby sitter.  Most people have their relatives watch their children, or they swap services with other moms, or maybe even ask a neighbor with whom they have bonded.  We didn't have any of these connections in our area.  Finally, I found a baby sitter by visiting the high school where I used to work.  Later, we found our current baby sitter through the recommendation of another mom.  (Our current baby sitter is a former student of mine, so that was a huge character reference!).  However you find one, just do it!  There were so many other times we could have gone out if we had just focused on the task sooner.  And a small baby sitter tip: College kids are great choices.  They are a little older and thus more responsible, drive their own car increasingly their availability without taking more of your time, and they have time during the day free, not just evenings and weekends.  

Use a baby sitter as a mother's helper:
I've done this several times and I wish I had done it sooner.  It is especailly helpful before a trip, holiday, or company.  Our baby sitter played with the kids while I cooked or cleaned.  I got a ton done that I would have had to try to squeeze into a couple hours after bed time otherwise.  Its also a great way to get your kids used to a baby sitter if they have separation or stranger anxiety. 

Embrace volunteers' offers to hold the baby:
Unless your child is going through one of those phases where he cried at all strangers, let other people hold the baby if they ask!  Over these past holidays, my daughter was struggling with torricolis and accepting no longer being an only child.  We passed little William around like a hot potato.  He didn't mind one bit and everyone got to get to know him some.   Its good for your child to interact with others to see how they are different from you and your spouse.  You never know, Grandpa might find a new game at which your son can't stop laughing, or he might just take a nap right on your sister's shoulder.  (Both of which happened with William).  And while you shouldn't let total strangers hold your child in the grocery store, let other moms hold the baby while you pay attention to your older child.  I'll never forget how a woman I hardly knew played with William for half an hour one play group so that I could give Natalie my undivided attention. 

Take your aggression out on inanimate objects:
While this is not the best advice, when I really can't take things and need an outlet, I let the cabinet doors and the stroller have it.  I slam those cabinets shut as hard as I can.  I let the stroller hit ever stair carrying it out to the car.  The physical release is just what I need to refocus sometimes.  I don't suggest doing these things where your kids can see, though.  Not only might it be scary for them (twenty-five years later I still have a very clear memory of my mom throwing a toy stroller), but you don't want them to copy you. 

Natalie and William up date

Natalie:

• Knows circle, square, rectangle, triangle, octagon, star, and heart. She can also find then in objects in a picture, like an apple is a circle and a book a rectangle.  She also says octagon whenever she sees a stop sign.  
• Knows about five or six letters like A, B, and S. She can reciet the alphabet song.
• Can reciet up to 15, but counts actual objects to 3 or 4. 
• Learning to say excuse me instead of move.
• Understands birds hatch from eggs. When Mike broke an egg for brownies she said it was hatching.
• Playing with and interacting more with William, such as laying with him on the floor or saying she misses or loves him and petting his head when he cries.
• Does well with sharing (mostly because doesn't become attached to one toy someone else is using)
• Whines a lot, so we are working on stopping it
• Will ask for a deal at dinner to get dessert
• Has started to say when she has had a food before
• Said "say, I like (name food)!" Like in Green Eggs and Ham
• Has whole songs memorized and cam sing them by herself. Sometimes will sing with is.
• Can blow her nose if you hold the tissue, but hasn't learned to cover when she sneezes for real.
• Went to her first movie!
• Loves to help at the grocery store by picking out produce and putting it in the bag.
• Can match items, but has a hard time doing so in an I Spy type book.
• Has started to say she is awesome.
• Says her toys are doing a great job doing things.
• Has graduated to real tantrums.  
• Helped unload the dishwasher by putting all the plastic items on the kitchen counter.  
• Pretend Baby Kitty is a dog by putting a make shift collar on her and wagging her tale. She barks, too.
• One time old me Baby Kitty was a butterfly. When asked what BK was doing as a butterfly, she said opening and closing her wings.
• Loves running around the coffee table, or similar objects.
• When she pretends to nap, she demands a goodnight book.
• One morning she told Mike she likes the color blue like the fishy towel, and then they talked about shades of blue on a blanket.
• Really good at making connections between stories.
• Has an awesome memory for stories in particular, but other small things, too. Like she remembers trick or treating over 3 months ago and wearing party hats one time at a birthday party 2 months ago.
• Struggles with concepts of time, but can wait a little while and will even say she is waiting. But anything past tomorrow is completely confusing and sometimes even later is hazy.
• Laughs when others do, even if she doesn't get the joke. Will say something is funny or silly

William:
Has 2 teeth!
Loves to stand and jump
Is going through a rough phase where nothing entertains him for more than five minutes (at least, I hope its a phase...)
Is more curious than Natalie was about objects out of reach
Tries to grab Mike's food at dinner
Can drink a little from a sippy cup with some help
"Kisses" or snuggles by leaning his forhead into you
Wants everything in his mouth, including books
Looks for an object he has dropped and will pick it up again if he can
Gets frusrated with toys, but keeps playing with them instead of fropping and picking something new
Can push up so far on his arms that only his toes remain on the ground, like a full push up excerise. Once or twice has experimented with bending his knees a bit under himself.
Discover buttons on clothes
Usually takes three naps and eats about 5 times during the day (at least 2 more during the night)
Loves bath in the big tub, especailly splashing, chasing toys, and rubber ducks to chew on
Watches Natalie and sometimes is comforted by her or smiles at her

Natalie's favorite things: Baby Kitty's tale, cookies, fruit, singing, being read to, hugs, lady bugs, trains, Kai-lan, superheroes, sunglasses, pretty clothes esp skirts that make her a ballerina / princess, helping, washing her hands, spinning, riding in the car, our neighbors, glue sticks, M&M's, TV, sitting on our laps, colors pink and purple

Day Dreaming of Spring

I usually have a hard time with this time of year as I'm dying for spring, but its been easy so far with our mild winter. We've only been stuck in due to snow a few times. I've only had to push the stroller through snow and ice a couple times as well.

Still, I'm day dreaming of spring and summer. This year, that is taking the form of playing with the kids in the back yard. William will be starting to crawl and walk led by the hands, and Natalie will be able to entertain herself quite a bit.

Last summer, out back yard had a wadding pool, a patch of dirt, a collection of pebbles, and a storage container lid that collected rain water. Natalie also enjoyed hiding behind the tree, picking up mini pine cones, and knocking on the shed door.

But I have big plans for this year. I plan to move her Cozy Coupe car and her smaller ride on toy outside. Also going outside is the mini basketball hoop and the balls. We might even bring out the picnic table and replace it with something smaller (though I worry about William dealing with small chairs as he learns to climb and walk).
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New to our house is a plastic cabin from Mike's aunt. It is almost 20 years old and needs to be reessembled, but otherwise it will be awesome. She also has some sort of climber with a slide we can have.

We plan to purchase a sand and water table, so Natalie will be upgraded from a patch of dirt where a tree once grew and a puddle. These come with covers so we won't have to worry about animals getting into it. I really regretted not getting one last year.

Smaller items on the to get list include a sprinkler and more yard toys, and hopefully a deck box to store them. We'll get some toddler sized chairs if we don't move the picnic table outside.

Lastly, we'll bring the colapseable platic play yard we use around the Christmas tree outside for William. We'll be able to check it for rocks and such, then plop him there to play..

Playing in the yard will be so awesome if the weather permits. Natlie will have room to run and so much to explore in terms of nature. And we can do lots of messy things. Learn to drink from a cup. Make mud pies. Paint. Plant seeds. Eat popsicles. Try undies without cleaning up the floor or furniture.

Maine spring and summer can be very disappointing, either rainy and gray or uncomfortably humid or hot. But for now I'm envisioning my little family enjoying a grassy back yard in cute shades, shorts, and sandles in perfect 75 degree weather.