Nursing Loves

There are many things about nursing that drive me crazy, but more often than not I enjoy breast feeding.  (I've said baby throughout to refer to both William and Natalie without pronouns). 


I still marvel at how my milk alone makes my baby double in size in about 4 months.

I feel so satisfied when baby releases with a quiet pop, sound asleep, with a content smile and a little dribble of milk from the corner of the mouth.

I love the closeness as baby hugs my breast, caresses my face, and tucks knees in around my side.

Even in the middle of a long night, I melt when baby stops, looks me in the eyes, and smiles at me.

Over time, I've come to enjoy the little tug on the nipple from latch and the tingle of let down, like the hurt of a good stretch.

I adore watching baby sleep using my breast as a pillow.

I love how baby and I are perfectly placed for a snuggle and eye to eye chat. I stare at baby's eyes and new teeth and beautiful skin and revel in the music of baby babble, adoring how most of it is directed at me. I bend over to kiss checks, nose and forehead and stroke hair and back.  I kiss baby's palms when baby reaches up to explore my face.

I feel confidence when I can calm a fussy mood, at least temporarily, and get an overtired or overstimulated baby to sleep.

As crazy as it is, I've come to like the smell of exclusively breastfed poop and dried breast milk on clothes.

I'm proud  I'm in such a minor percentage of women who feed past six months (yet also glad no one has ever called me a nut or critized me about continuing).

Lucky Charm Treats

I wanted to make something special for our little play date the day before St Patrick's Day.  I knew you could make cereal bars like Rice Krispie treats pretty easily, so I looked it up.  Turns out the recipe is exactly the same.  I decided to half it knowing that the full yield in the past was too much for us. 

What you need:

•  3 cups of Lucky Charms (6 if doing a full recipe)
• 2 cups of mini marshmallows (4 if doing full recipe)
• 1 1/2 tablespoons of butter or margarine (3 tablespoons if doing full recipe)
• green food coloring
• large pan to melt and mix in
• mini muffin tin
• mini muffin cups
• metal spoon
• wax or parchment paper
• oven mitt or trivet

 What to do:

I had hoped Natalie would be able to help me more, but it was just too sticky and she doesn't like having dirty hands anyway!  She did a great job lining the tins and sucking the melted green marshmallow of the spoon!

1.  Melt the butter in the pan on low heat.
2. Add the marshmallows.  Stir them and watch them to prevent them from burning.
3. Once thoroughly melted and smooth, remove from the heat and place on oven mitt on table / counter.
4. Stir in a few drops of green food coloring.
5. Add the cereal and stir.  I added half and then half again. Use a strong spoon.
6. Scoop into the lined muffin tins.  Try using parchment paper to help you do this because it is very sticky.  You could also butter the spoon or spray it with non-stick cooking spray. 

The yield turned out perfect.  We had enough to fill the two tins including letting us eat some as we went along.   I used mini muffins because our play date is for toddlers and I wanted to moms to easily control how much sugar their kids got, but I originally saw this done with Rice Krispies in large tins

St Patty's Leprechaun

To make your leprechaun exactly like ours you will need:
Green paint
Green glitter
Thick white paper
Heart sponge
Plate (or something to put paint on to dip the sponge in)
Green craft foam
Flesh colored craft foam (or white foam and paint)
Pom poms (for eyes, nose, beard, hands and boots)
Four green sequins
Two small yellow foam circles
Two green pipe cleaners (cut in half)
Scissors
Hole punch
Craft glue
Pencil (to wrap pipe cleaners around)


Day 1: Painting

I set up a piece of heavy painting paper.  I then put some green paint on a plastic plate and mixed in some green glitter.  The plan was to see if Natalie could use the heart sponge to make clovers, but at two and a half, she wasn't ready for that.  So, she just had fun pressing it all over the paper.  In fact, she had so much fun that we set the first sheet aside and she covered a whole second sheet adding other colors and a star sponge.

I let the paint dry, and that night I traced the heart sponge on a big patch of green paint to make the clover.  I tried to make a four leaf clover, but couldn't get it to look right in the green paint sploch I had, so I went with three leaves.  I then cut out the clover.

Day 1.5 or Night Before Assembly:
The night before I prepped all the pieces and stuck them in a ziplock bag for safe keeping until a good craft time presented itself.

I didn't have any flesh colored craft foam, so I mixed yellow, red, and white to make a pink color.  I let it dry and cut out a circle for the head.  (You could use paper or felt instead). 

I then cut out a hat out of green craft foam.  I measured it against the circle to make sure I didn't make it too big or small.  (You could use paper or felt instead). 

I cut two green pipe cleaners in half.  I then wrapped them around a pencil to make them spring like.  (You could use foam, ribbon, or string instead, but it won't have the same look). 

Then I just had to gather the remaining pieces.  I got three medium orange pom poms for the beard.  I got this idea from a craft on Pinterest, which is what inspired this whole craft in the first place.  I pulled two tiny black pom poms for eyes.  We usually use googly eyes, and I thought this would be a nice change.  You could use a different color, of course.  I also pulled a tiny pink pom pom for the nose.  Originally I was going to cut out hands and boots our of craft foam (you could again use paper or felt), but they didn't look so great, so I swapped them for slightly bigger pom poms. 

Looking through my scrap box I found the two little yellow foam circles and decided to make buckles on the shoes.  (You could swap tiny pom poms or gems).  I also found some green sequins and thought they'd make a cute shamrock for the hat.  (Again, pom poms or gems could work here). 

Day 2: Assembly
The order you put it together probably doesn't matter, but here is how Natalie and I decided to do it.

She understands faces the best, so she was anxious to put on the eyes, nose, and beard.  Since she is so young, I squeeze the glue on to the foam, and she places the pom poms.  Next, we put on the hat.  I glued on the sequins because I didn't want her to get too frustrated picking them up.

I then showed Natalie how the hole puncher worked and punched holes for the arms and legs.  I put one arm threw the hole to show her how, and then she put the other three through the holes.  I bent the pipe cleaner over a little so that it stayed in place.

I put glue on the hand and feet pom poms and held the pipe cleaners in place for Natalie to put them on.  Lastly, I dabbed glue on the boots and she places on the buckles.

Update

Natalie:
* starting to understand idea of a last name and repeat her's
* starting to count objects versus just reciting numbers
* can play a matching game when she is interested
* tries to manipulate us by acting sad
* can pull down her pants, take off socks with help, sometimes take off shoes, and take off a coat / sweater if it is pushed off her shoulders
* constantly learning new words and pretty much always takes in full sentences, often 10 words long
* colors with purpose and says she is drawing certain things
* continues to be insightful about William's emotions and needs
* says excuse me
* wanted something off the TV for the first time and talks about it from time to time
* likes hide and seek
* adds new things to her vocabulary after hearing once

William:
* rocking and hopping on knees
* a few times has gotten from knees back to bum
* getting the hang of chewing solid food
* working on pincer grasp
* interacting with other kids and babies
* enjoying books
* more interest in toys
* can stand holding on to a table for a short while
* says dads and hi pretty consistently

Natalie had the best day she's had in a while. Antics included:

* sitting on the potty with Mommy
* coloring
* playing with blocks
* singing a lot
* fun at play date inclding joining in group "excercises," ring around the rosie, and hide and seek
* climbing uo and down set of 6 steps alone
* whining over normal two year old things like sharing toys
* playing ghost
* running away from Mommy at bath time
* sponge painting
* eating a whole tuna sandwich, yogurt, blueberries at lunch
* laughing at funny noises
* shreiking
* hiding from Daddy and William
* petting a cat
* giving Baby Kitty a ride in a stroller
* talking on the phone about her day

Meanwhile, after two good nights of sleep, William was grumpy this afternoon. He had fun at our play date chewing on doll house furniture and tea cups and playing with a couple friends briefly, but he had to be forced to eat and banged his head a few times. In the afternoon, he got upset about even the smallest crawling set back. I think one leg may feel stiff from shots.

Every night before I go to bed it seems I promise that tomorrow I will be a better mother, yet there I am the next night promising again. Usually the same mistakes get me again and again, though not necessarily consecutive days.

Goals:
* I will not lose patience with Natalie over attributes that may be related to whatever medically is wrong with her right now. This includes crying and whining about picking things up, climbing, stairs, laying down, and removing her own clothes. This also means not rushing her walking.

* I will play with and talk to William more including reading and praising him. I'll try to include him more in what I do with Natalie. Too often its bed time and we share a few wonderful moments and I realize I've missed him all day.

* I will not let things that don't need to be done get in the way of paying attention to the kids. This includes a large array of things from frivolus Facebook and Pinterest to more productive cleaning and phone calls.

* I will actively play with Natalie more versus just interacting with her over snacks, dressing, choosing TV shows, and calming her crying.

* I will not yell at or otherwise by mean to either child when fet up with their crying over what seems like nothing over and over again. It obviously isn't nothing to them and they don't mean to ruin storytime or lunch or crafts or whatever.

* I will try to remember that play is for fun, learning and working out stress, and not just a way to keep them each busy while I deal with the other, pee, or otherwise try to function.

* I will not talk about Natalie where she can hear me unless it is planned to praise her. I also won't swear in front of her.

* I will try not to push either child beyond his or her capabilities including William self soothing and Natalie using the potty.

* I will try not to compare my children to others, even when just determining average for medical reasons.

A lot of the reason today went poorly was stress over not knowing what behaviors of Natalie's are associated with physical problems coupled with guilt that William isn't getting my attention like Natalie did. I just wind up so frustrated that I'm mean to Natalie and too wound up to enjoy William.

Rough day around here. Mike has a cold. William has a cold and might be cutting his front teeth. He is also now getting up on his knees and rocking, so mobility continues to be frusrating for him. I thought I was over my cold, then all the sudden this afternoon my sore troat just reappears. My sholders, arms and a couple places on my back are also sore since I volenteered to shovel the driveway yesterday since Mike has a cold. I haven't shoveled snow in about three years, if not four.

Because of his cold or teeth or something, William continues to have sleeping problems. Last night he was up several times including a stretch in the bed where he head butted me in the eye. Tonight he has already had trouble several times and I gave up for the night a few minutes to 9. I just want to go to sleep. I didn't sleep well last night, feel I'm getting sick again, and know Mike is going to be working late tomorrow. (Add to everything that work is stressing Mike out. He usually has too little work, but its piling up right now).

But the real straw that breaks the camel's back is Natalie. We took her to the doctor on Friday after a full week of noticing more and more ways she isn't like other two year olds. The doctor agreed that Natalie's knees didn't look right and that her morning shuffling was concerning. So tomorrow we are going to get an appointment with an orthepedic doctor for some time in the next couple weeks. So, this appoitment was slightly validating, but didn't answer any real questions or do anything to help Natalie.

Today, we had a play date with a neighbor. Her little girl has always had excellent motor skills. She is about 3 months younger than Natalie but learned to crawl and walk at thw same time. Anyway, being a weekend it was the first time Mike has been around for one of these play dates. He got to see how the way our little neoghbor moves is so different from how Natalie moves. She runs, climbs, jumps, and bends down with such ease and fluidity. Natalie is so gaurded and slow. Also, our little neighbor also appeared to have better control of her hands, pulling small pieces on toys that Natalie doesn't seem to be able to do. It was very upsetting for Mike. It was pretty upsetting for me too, even though I've been seeing it more and more over the last week or so.

I feel bad that we though some of this behavior was regression or attention seeking. Right now it doesn't seem that way at all.

I just get so sad when I think of the things Natalie could do before, but not anymore. She could climb stairs with a railing and no help back in sept. She could climb up on the bed in William's bed with now help. she could bend in half and look between her legs. She could sit down easily for a diaper change. She sometimes cries when we walk places while l'm pushing the stroller. Thinking of it now, I think its because I'm walking too fast for her. Sometimes I think this loss of skills is my fault for not offering her the oppertunity to practice anymore, but when it is combines with how she moves so stiffly, I don't think it is lack of practice. I wish we were more active with her, but what am I supposed to do in the middle of the winter with a baby too? What if all of this is because we aren't parenting her well? Not giving her enough oppertunity to excerise or not giving her what her body needs? I feel horrible at these thoughts and tey to dismiss them knowing we are doing the best we can at the moment, but them also know we could do better. I feel like the onset of these symptoms and the beginning of winter have coinsided making it hard to know if the reduction in activity is a factor. Or is even cyclic? Her neck caused her to stop moving as much which led to more of the same later?

We just can't wait for some answers. Natalie's spirts are far better than when all this started 4 months ago, but it is still so sad to see her not living up to her potential and in pain. To hear her say she can't do something.

And I really would love to sleep laying down for a few hours with no one crying to waking me up.